Monday, May 5, 2008

My lucky day!

Yes!

I would have to say this is one lucky day for the Craigman, wouldn’t you?

This morning, I received the following email after receiving a fairly similar one on Saturday. It’s good to know people in foreign lands are trying to help out my financial situation, isn’t it. My answer to them are at the end of each email.

Let’s take a gander, shall we?

TODAY’S EMAIL:

FROM: DESK OF DR MUSA IBRAHIM.AUDITING AND ACCOUNTING SECTION OFBANK OF AFRICA(B.O.A)OUAGADOUGOU BURKINA-FASO.

Dear Friend,I know that this mail will come to you as a surprise. I am the director in charge of auditing and accounting section of Bank Of Africa Ouagadougou Burkina Faso in West Africa .

I Hoped that you will not expose or betray this trust and confident that i am about to expose on you for the mutual benefit of our both families.We need your urgent assistance in transferring the sum of $10.5 million united states dollars immediately to your account.

The money has been dormant for years in our Bank here without any body coming for it. We want to release the money to you as the nearest person to our deceased customer(the owner of the account)who died along with his supposed next of kin in an air crash since July 2000.We don't want the money to go into our Bank treasury as an abandoned fund.

So this is the reason why i contacted you,so that we can release the money to you as the nearest person to the deceased customer. Please we would like you to keep this proposal as a top secret and delete if you are not interested.

Upon receipt of your reply,i will send you full details on how the business will be executed and also note that you will have 35% of the above mentioned sum if you agree to transact the business with us.In acceptance the following information stated below are required:1)Your age2)Your full name and address.3)Your marital status4)Your occupation/Profession5)Your direct telephone/Fax numbers6)Your passport details for legal operations.

Yours, Sincerely
Dr. Musa Ibrahim.

NB, MAKE SURE YOU KEEP THIS TRANSACTION AS YOUR TOP SECRET AND MAKE IT CONFIDENTIAL TILL WE RECEIVES THE FUND INTO THE ACCOUNT THAT YOU WILL PROVIDE TO THE BANK. DON'T DISCLOSE IT TO ANY BODY "PLEASE", BECAUSE THE SECRECY OF THIS TRANSACTION IS AS WELL AS THE SUCCESS OF IT.

MY RESPONSE:

Musa,

How’re they hanging, dude?

Man, I feel so lucky to receive this email and sorry to hear about your customer who died in the plane crash. Seems like that happens to a lot of bank customers in West Africa, huh? Pilots must suck down there, eh?

Hey, do you know any terrorists? Sorry Musaman, I can’t agree to transact business with you at 35 percent. I would need at least 50 percent.

Here is some of the stuff you requested. The other information will be sent after I forward the information to the FBI to find out the accuracy of this offer.

NAME: Barrack Obama
OCCUPATION: Future president of the United States
ADDRESS: Kissmybootie, Illinois

SATURDAY’S EMAIL:

FROM THE DESK OF MR DANJUMA BELLOBILLS AND EXCHANGE MANAGER,BANK OF AFRICA (B.O.A)OUAGADOUGOU-BURKINA FASO.WEST AFRICA

DEAR FRIEND,


I am the manager of bill and exchange at the foreign remittance department BANK OF AFrica (B.O.A) here in Ouagadougou, Burkina Faso.

In my department we discovered an abandoned sum of US$10.5m (TEN MILLION FIVE HUNDRED THOUSANDS US DOLLAR) in an account that belongs to one of our foreign customer (MR. ANDREAS SCHRANNER from Munich, Germany) who died along with his entire family on Monday,31 July, 2000. in a plane crash .

Since we got information about his death, we have been expecting his next of kin to come over and claim his money because we cannot release it unless.some body applies for it as next of kin or relation to the deceased as indicated in our banking guidlings and laws but unfortunately we learn that all his supposed next of kin or relation died alongside with him at the plane crash leaving nobody behind for the claim

It is therefore upon this discovery that I now decided to make this business proposal to you and releasethe money to you as the next of kin or relation to the deceased for safety and subsequent disbursement since nobody is coming for it and we don't want this money to go into the bank treasury as unclaimed bill.

The banking law and guidline here stipulates that if such money remained unclaimed after eight years,the money will be transfered into the bank treasury as unclaimed fund The request of foreigner as , next of kin in this business is occassioned by the fact that the customer was a foreigner,and a Burkinabe,cannot stand as next of kin to a foreigner

I agree that 40% of this money will be for you as a respect to the provisionof a foriegn account , 10% will be set aside for expenses incurred during.the business and 50% would be for me

Thereafter, I will visit your country for disbursement according to the percentage indicated Therefore, to enable the immediate transfer of this fund to you arranged,you must apply first to the bank as relation or next of kin of the deceased indicating your bank name, your bank account number, your private telephone and fax number for easy and effective communication and location where the money will be remmitted.

Upon receipt of your reply, I shall send to you a specimen of application which you will forward to the paying bank introducing yourself and at the same time instructing bank to effect the release of the fund into your account, I will not fail to bring to your notice that this transaction is hitch-free and that you should not entertain any atom of fear as all required arrangements have been made for the transfer

You should contact me immidiately as soon as you receive this message for more information Thanks for your co-operation.

Your sincerely
DANJUMA BELLO

MY RESPONSE:

Danjudaman!,

Thanks for your interesting offer. Have you ever heard of spell check? Or grammar? Perhaps a person of your stature could ask somebody to review your correspondence before sending out emails.

Gosh, you mean another customer died in a plane crash and left a huge sum of money? Must be contagious, huh?

I am a little worried about your offer. I did a search of MR. ANDREAS SCHRANNER and it appears this has been used in various Nigerian scam offers. Danjuma, I’m just glad this came from you and not somebody I can’t trust.

Dan, what exactly is an atom of fear. Excuse my ignorance, but that phrase is not one I have heard before.

Just go ahead and send me a cashier’s check to my address. After the check clears and I wait two months to make sure everything is okay, you can get your information, cool?

Your buddy,

Craig

1 Comments:

At May 5, 2008 at 9:15 AM , Blogger John Inman said...

Craig, I receive these kind of emails, too. Just so you know, you're not the only with friends in South Africa. I responded pretty much the same way you did. So, that's something else we have in common -- writing blogs, ex-sports writers. and responding to folks in South Africa in the same manner. Congrats are in order, huh?

 

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